Seriously, Some People Are Crazy

Well I have to say that today was a very interesting day. I work all day Wednesdays and Thursdays so I was looking forward to some much needed R&R before I head to work tomorrow. I rolled out of bed (literally) around 7:45 and took it nice and slow enjoying my breakfast, checking facebook - the usual. Adam got online a little later and I got to have a nice long chat with him which was great considering his work schedule changed and we haven't been able to talk much lately. So after my shower I headed to Wal-Mart with mom to get some much needed groceries to prepare for Adam and the in -laws arrival next week (SOOO exciting!). Can I just say, I literally saw myself as Natalie Portman in "Where the Heart Is"? (AKA, the lady who has her baby in Wal-Mart). I mean I am 38 weeks now and Maggie Claire has dropped into position. Walking through that store, I literally felt like she was going to fall out on the floor right in the middle of the Wheat Thins and Keebler cookies. It was miserable. However, there was a VERY hilarious woman who brightened my day. Picture this if you will....

I go into the restroom as soon as we walk into Wal-Mart (yes, this is nothing unusual). As I walk in, mind set on task at hand, I pass an older African American woman wearing the quintessential "I'm-elderly-but-want-to-look-cool" outfit... aka- outdated leopard print blouse and black pants. I even think I remember her sporting a black hat of some sort... Anyway, to add to the hilarity of the situation, this poor woman has bright coral lipstick covering not only her lips, but the entire outside of her lips as well (think little girl playing dress up for the first time...) Now, all of this is perfectly normal considering I am in Florence, AL in a Wal-Mart restroom. Then, it turns interesting. As my eyes now focus on the empty stall that lay before me, I rush past the woman only to be caught completely off guard by the following statement "Yous having a boy aint ya?". Excuse me? I swung around to face the lipstick lady and responded "oh, no ma'm. We're having a girl." The following short conversation ensued:

lady " Oh ok. Yous holding a lot of water ain ya?"

me (completely taken aback by the statement) "umm, yeah I guess so" I took her comment to mean I looked a little "fluffy"... nice....

lady "my little neice just had a baby. She had a boy..."

It trails at this point because however rude it might have been, after the "retaining water" statment I smiled and went into the stall. She still kept talking but drowned out after the flush. I guess she got the point and headed off to harass some other person. Seriously. She did. I walked out to find mom only to pass my bathroom buddy chatting it up with some Wal-Mart employee who looked equally as confused and desperate as I probably had in the restroom.

Well, while I did expect MC to make her way into the world in the middle of aisle 5, she hung in there and we headed back home. We had to rush to get things out of the car because I had bought tickets to see New Moon, and time was getting close. I knew mom hadn't been sucked in to the Twilight drama, so I bought her a ticket to see Blind Side while I watched Edward and Jacob battle it out for Bella. Her movie started about 40 minutes before mine so we had to get there early. I'll tell ya what - I'm glad we did!!! Holy crap! The line to get into the movie was already out the door when I got there! Needless to say, I wasn't too thrilled about standing there with psycho teeny boppers for God knows how long, but I made it. Perfect scenario? The kind people in line let the pregnant woman scoot to the front. Did it happen? Of course not. Oh well. It wasn't nearly as bad as the little teenage dirt bag working the ticket taking post...

Yes, I know the movie workers are all stressed out right now. Its a big crowd and I'm sure it gets crazy. However, don't give me lip. I am pregnant and not in the mood for your crap. Let me explain. After waiting forever in line to even get into the theatre, I had to find a seat. I was lucky to get a good one, although it wasn't on the end. This is a problem when you have to go to the restroom every 20 minutes. Anyway, I went right before the movie started thinking I would be able to make it. Yeah... didn't happen. So I have to crawl through the people on my row AGAIN, waddle down the stairs AGAIN, and make it to the restroom outside. These first two trips happened without incident. Then, on lucky trip number three, I come out of the restroom and walk by the "I-only-wish-I-had-facial-hair" guy. He stops me and says "uh, I need to see your stub to let you back in." Are you kidding me? Did you really not remember the fat pregnant woman who has come in and out of the theatre twice already? I mean, I'm kinda hard to miss. I said "well, um I don't have it. I left my purse inside." He then responds "Oh, well you'll need to go back and get it." I (getting slightly irritated) then said "you want me to go inside, get the stub, and come back out??" Let's think about this rationally. It was a freaking act of congress for my fat butt to even make it out of my seat... now you want me to go back inside, do it all again, show you my stupid piece of paper, then go back inside and do it YET AGAIN?! I wanted to slap the guy. He must've picked up on the frustration in my last question and finally said "oh forget it. Just go in". You're damn right I will! I mean crap, who tries to sneek into a movie being shown right in front of the ticket post with only about 20 minutes left in the whole movie??? Ugh.

Well, good thing is, Maggie Claire stayed put long enough for me to see the movie. Every since I found out I was pregant, I have been telling her she has to stay in there long enough for me to make it to New Moon. Good girl. Sad part is, I was disappointed! Am I the only one? I just wasn't impressed. Granted, I did think Kristen looked way better in this film than the last one, but I guess the movie just didn't stack up to the book for me. I thought the first one was way better. Sad. Maybe Eclipse will be great and make up for it. Thoughts?

Got to get up early for work tomorrow so I need to get to bed. Hope everyone has a happy Saturday!!