May 19, 2009

Rollercoaster of Love

Well, here it is... the newest belly photo! I am currently 10 weeks and am feeling all of the joyous side effects of pregnancy.

I started this blog to stay busy while Adam is in Iraq, but I think it is going to be a great way to document my pregnancy and being a first time mom. While I am not a complete newbie on the blogging scene, (some of you might remember my past ravings on "life in cheerio land") I have inevitably forgotten almost everything I taught myself. The point? Bear with me as I tinker with the format and "prettiness" haha.

So what is new in my life? Oh, so glad you asked! My husband Adam is currently doing his training to be deployed to Iraq in June. He has not even been gone a week and it is absolutely tortuous. During the day I have been able to keep myself busy, but evenings and nights alone in the apartment stink. I got my dog from my parent's house when I went home so that I could have some company, but that was a HUGE mistake. This is my night: put Abby on the bed, get in the bed, watch/listen/feel Abby jump off the bed, listen to Abby whine, put Abby on the bed, get in the bed, watch/listen/feel Abby jump off the bed, listen to Abby whine... you get the idea. WHAT THE CRAP??? Is the dog bipolar??? I can just think about what is going through her head as she does this to me "I want on the bed. Ew, no I don't. Wait, I know I want on the bed. Ew, no, still don't...Okay, i have thought about it and I know I totally want up there now. Ummm..on the other hand..." I have slept a total of 6 hours in the last two nights. Maybe God is preparing me for motherhood.

Speaking of motherhood, how does something so small make you feel SOOOO sick and tired? It blows my mind that our baby is now the size of a kumquat, yet has the ability to make me feel like I am dying. I still haven't gotten "sick" for lack of a more stomach friendly word, but at times I think it might be better than just feeling nauseous all day. In addition to feeling like everything I have ever eaten is wanting to rejoin the world, I am EXHAUSTED! I admit that even before I got pregnant I was tired after teaching all day, but now I am a vegetable when I get home. I'm ready for school to be out and have a few days to be a complete bum and do NOTHING. The last thing I have to comment on is the inspiration for my title. I feel like a complete mental case right now! I'm not talking usual PMS craziness... I'm talking straight jacket and silence of the lambs mask needed crazy. I feel kinda bad calling poor Abby bipolar now...I was on the phone with Adam yesterday and my poor husband had to listen to me be a complete booty head for no reason. I then preceeded to cry because I just felt like it. Whoa. Forget Iraq - I have a major hormone war going on that needs some serious peace talk. Maybe all that will get better... any past preggers know? Or am I just stuck in psycho-ville for the rest of eternity?

I suppose this boring post has gone on long enough. I'm gonna be all Kate-ish (from Jon and Kate plus 8) and steal the line that I didn't write this for anyone else (she was referring to her New York Times best selling books), I am writing it to deal with all of the rollercoaster of emotions I am experiencing at this point in my life. If someone happens to like hearing about morning sickness and missing loved ones then power to them! If not.. well, um.. read someone elses :)

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